Archive for June, 2012

Are you over or under parenting your child?

 

 

 

Are you over or under parenting your child?

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There have been numerous reports throughout the past century regarding the proper parenting techniques. Is it possible to spoil an infant (under 1 yr.)? (The answer is a resounding no.) But what about when the child gets older…can you smother him/her with parental affection and attention? The answer is a resounding yes.

Askmen.com has a new article discussing this issue. In a recent study, results have shown that fathers who don’t try to hard, end up being better parents. You know, the fathers that like to compete with each other, “Oh Tommy’s better at this…I take him here everyday…” Studies have shown that Little Tommy will grow up better with a less worried and stressed father, than an over-protective one trying to keep up with the Jones’ family.

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“Coping With New Parenthood”

“The latest research out of Ohio State University, which appears in the journal Personality and Individual Differences, suggests that parents who feel pressure to be perfect parents can work at cross purposes. Called the “New Parents Project,” this study is one part of a longitudinal look at how working parents cope with new parenthood. The researchers studied 182 couples who became parents between 2008 and 2010, and found that external pressure to be perfect parents affects parenting skills differently than self-directed, internal pressure to be a good parent.

The difference was most striking for fathers. If new fathers were particularly worried about living up to the social ideals of their peer group, they tended to do worse than fathers who put the pressure on themselves. Mothers, on the other hand, showed more parental stress no matter where the pressure came from. One other interesting note is that fathers who responded to self-directed, internal pressure and didn’t give a hoot about keeping up with the Joneses tended to be better fathers. The researchers added that they weren’t sure what the long-term effects on parenting this kind of internal pressure would have, but for newborns it can be a good thing”

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In a recent article published by Psych Central, By Rick Nauert PhD Senior News Editor, Reviewed by John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on November 30, 2011:

“Parents of newborns show poorer adjustment to their new role if they believe society expects them to be “perfect” moms and dads, a new study shows.

While stress upsets each parent, stress influences each parent in different ways. Moms showed less confidence in their parenting abilities and dads felt more stress when they were more worried about what other people thought about their parenting skills.

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However, self-imposed pressure to be perfect was somewhat better for parents, especially for fathers, according to the results.”

Nauert also claims that “Societal-oriented perfectionism is “being concerned about what other people think about your parenting,” Schoppe-Sullivan said. It was measured by asking people how much they agreed with statements like “Most people always expect me to always be an excellent parent.”

So next time you want to coddle your 12 year old son, think again fathers. The trick is to be stress-free, a mean between extremes, and always keep your cool.

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A New, Eccentric Way of Meeting a Potential Mate

 

 

 

We’ve come a long way in the art of courtship over the centuries. Or have we? It really only comes down to one thing in the end…biology. So it makes sense when this new theme for a dating party arises, and becomes a hit. Or shall we say a hormonal orgy? It’s actually a genius idea and CLM sends serious kudos to the “inventor” of such a party: Enter The Pheromone Party.

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A new article featured in Askmen.com says the following: “Enter the Pheromone Parties. You sleep in a clean T-shirt for three nights to capture your body’s odor, then bring it to a party in a Ziploc bag. Guests smell the bags, which are labeled with a number and nothing more, letting their primal instincts guide their mate selection. The thought of answering “online” when someone asks me how I met my significant other kind of embarrasses me, but “body odor” is a mind f*ck I think a lot of us aren’t ready for.”

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Haven’t you ever noticed yourself loving the scent of your lover/wife/husband? Something pulls you to them and you only like their scent. This is totally biological and a necessary part of finding the ideal mate, especially when it comes to body chemistry, reproduction, and the ideal exchange of genetics.

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So during the course of this kind of party, guests photograph themselves holding the labeled bag with the shirt if they LIKE the scent. This photograph is then projected on a white wall and if the owner if interested, he/she will approach the person in the photograph. Cool, huh? It’s kind of like a win-win situation because you’re not risking rejection per-say, and it’s highly likely that if a person vibes with your scent, you will vibe with their scent as well, plus you get to see a picture of them beforehand.

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Creator Judith Prays says the following in a recent interview: “How exactly do pheromones work?
JP: Pheromones are the chemical triggers of sexual attraction in mammals. Pheromones determine fecundity; if you are attracted to someone’s pheromones, it is an indicator that you two will have healthy offspring. While not confirmed, it is suspected that males smell availability and females smell genetic quality. ”

 

 

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Trying to Beat the Heat in NYC?

 

 

 

In case you haven’t noticed, there has been a record heat wave going on in New York City. (Also, in case you haven’t noticed, CLM is based out of NY so we’re speaking from the thick of it.) It’s seriously…swampy out there friends.

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So how do New Yorkers stay cool? Of course it’s a rarity for anyone to actually have central AC, and those window units spike your electric bill throug

h the roof (where all the heat resides. ‘Cause, you know, heat travels upwards…) Well, turns out there is a reason why there is a Starbucks on every other corner in Manhattan: to save us all from the heat via iced drinks, fraps, and…you guessed it, central AC. Maybe your office AC broke down, maybe it’s still too stuffy at your desk, where to go? You guessed it…Starbucks.

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Other ways to stay cool, and we’re not strictly talking temperature here.

Cut Off Shorts:

This look is in for both men and women alike. Take an old pair of jeans, or even new because they will still look awesome, and simply cut where you want them to end. Give yourself a few extra inches because they will ride up once they are on your body and become shorter. This is always true when washing, the frayed ends will make the length rise slightly. It’s better to cut them too long at first, then too short.

Handkerchief to dab off excess moisture in style

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The Perfect Sandal (or Mandal)

Unless you have perfect manicured feet, there is no reason for men to wear flipflops. One of the biggest fashion faux pas is a snagged toe foot in a flip flop in the summertime. Don’t be a victim this season. Try something sporty like these Nike slip ons (http://www.zappos.com/nike-solarsoft-slide-black-white?zfcTest=fw:1)

Check out this amazing, informative article from Askmen.com: http://www.askmen.com/fashion/fashiontip_400/454b_mens-sandals-dos-donts.html. They give you a complete low down on the DOs and DON’Ts of male sandal wearing…also known as Mandals.

“It can be downright difficult to find a men’s sandal that is both simple and stylish if you want something other than flip-flops. The solution: a cross-strap sandal. There are no bells and whistles here; just two uncomplicated straps to hold your foot in place. It’s also the perfect sandal if you find a traditional flip-flop that slips on between your toes to be uncomfortable. Just be careful not to go with certain faux-leather types or you could risk looking like grandpa at the retirement home.”

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A fresh hair cut:

Check out Groupon or Living Social to find cool deals in your area. You can search by neighborhood, or find the hot deals of the day. Maybe even go for an old school razor shave at a traditional barber shop. Remember those? The ones with the red and white swirling sign? Check out this website featuring FRESH NEW HAIRCUTS FOR MEN in 2011.

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Five Beach Spots on the East Coast

 

Ocean City, Maryland

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By far, Ocean City Maryland is one of the best beaches on the east coast. It’s labeled a “family” beach, but gets rocking after hours. The main beach during peak summer months is fairly crowded, but perfect for people watching, especially on the boardwalk, which stretches for a couple miles. On the boardwalk you’ll find shops, restaurants, bars, nightclubs, an amusement park, and more. There’s, of course, the standard miniature golf places, but the place really boasts the best MARYLAND CRABS and seafood. Check out Hoopers on your way in on the the main bridge and of course, the infamous nightclub/day bar Seacrets. You can drink in rafts all day at Seacrets, get lunch or dinner, and get your fill of tan, youthful bodies.

There’s also nearby historic village Berlin and secluded Delaware beaches less than a few miles away.

Siesta Key, FL

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What to say about this miniature paradise…Siesta Key boasts some of the finest sand in the world, extra white, with bath-temperature like water. It’s not a big party town, but it’s a perfect little paradise to relax, sip a cocktail, lounge with a loved one, and take a raft out for hours to lay out in the Gulf of Mexico. In the evening, the downtown area has some cool tiki bars with a decent nightlife.

Myrtle Beach, SC

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Far Rockaway, NY

One of best aspects of this beach is that it’s technically still in New York City. Shocker. Well, we were shocked here at Cufflinksman, because it simply takes about an hour train ride from the Upper East Side in Manhattan and…you’re there. A little secret though…once you get off the A train, make a left around one of the blocks to hop on a city bus that takes you (about another 10 minute ride) to a more secluded, public beach called Fort Tilden. It’s clean, the water is nice, and you can have lunch on 5th avenue, shop at Barneys, and go surfing all in one day. We told you it’s cool to be a New Yorker.

Cape May, NJ
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Here’s what the folks at Fodor’s Travel Intelligence had to say about Cape May:

“Sunset Beach. Cape May, the southernmost point in New Jersey and believed to be the oldest beachfront resort in the country, is also a National Historic Landmark. There are many vacation rentals and beaches to choose from here, but one of the most charming is Sunset Beach, walking distance from the Cape May lighthouse. Here you’ll find plenty Cape May “diamonds” (pebbles of pure, rounded quartz) that have washed up on the shore, and your kids will love hunting around for them. Be sure to drive—or better yet bicycle—the 3 mi to the south end of Sunset Boulevard for the sunset flag ceremony held from June through September.”

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What Does Your Inner Animal Spirit Say About You?

Straight from our in-house psychic/quiz master. Yes, that’s right…our own personal guru guide to spirit animals right here at Cufflinksman. What does your animal spirit guide say about you?? Ages 3 and up.

Here’s what you do to find out. Look at the following list of words and pick whichever word sticks out to you/fits you the most.

Loyal

Joyous

Free Spirited

Dreamy

Helpful

Flirtatious

Scroll down for the results….

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Is the DOG your animal spirit guide?

If you picked Loyal, Your Animal Spirit Guide is a Dog: You are a very loyal and family member. Resilient against troubles, but anxious when alone. Naturally intuitive.

Is the lucky CAT your spirit guide?

f you picked Dreamy, Your Animal Spirit Guide is a Cat: Family oriented, playful, sometime fierce personality. Occasionally has trust issues with others and can be easily swayed. This leads to indecisiveness in most activities. However, when you find something you love, you stick with it.

Is the DOLPHIN your animal spirit guide?

If you picked Joyous, Your Animal Spirit Guide is a Dolphin: Generally extremely loving personality, you charm your way out of any problem and love being the center of attention. Naturally understanding and sympathetic. You can be manipulative and deceitful at times, but never malicious.

 

Is the BIRD your animal spirit guide?

f you picked Flirtatious, Your Animal Spirit Guide is a Bird: You tend to be a picky person. Sensitive and hard to control, your a thoughtful person, but not especially deep. You can sometimes be timid around new people and prefer not to be in large groups and outings.

 

s the HORSE your animal spirit guide?

f you picked Free Spirited, Your Animal Spirit Guide is a Horse: You have a free, carefree spirit. The thoughts of others don’t effect you the they do other people. You would rather travel around your whole life than be stuck in one place forever. Generally nomadic people, however extremely loyal to one or two persons their entire life.

Is the LADYBUG your animal spirit guide?

If you picked Helpful, Your Animal Spirit Guide is a Lady Bug: You’re a humble, a closet do-gooder type. You secretly love making others happy and love bringing fortune into others’ lives.

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