Cufflinksman Speaks…

Just friends, well, kind of…
-Go back to Kindergarten. What exactly does that mean? Think short notes, small flowers, a speck of candy, and maybe a mini monkey bear thing. It just shows “you’re a sweetheart in my book” and “I’ll save extra carrots for you during snack time.”

-Surprise her with a gift card to something you know she loves (like Starbucks?), get her a copy of your favorite book (so she’ll think of you while reading), or burn her a CD of your favorite tunes (same concept here). Tie each with a red ribbon and then go out for a drink with tapas. (It says ‘casual’). Buy her at least two glasses of wine, and then see where the night takes you…

You think she’s awesome, but maybe not the “one” you’re going to end up with in the end
-First, please refer to “Friends with Extra Benefits” section. Next mix options “Just friends, kind of” and “Dating for 3+ months.” There you have a perfect match, vis a vie gift anyway…

You are hopelessly in love with her
-This is the most complicated category of this entire blog. What to do, what to do…I would normally say, refer to number ____, but that doesn’t mean much. So, it’s time to get real. What does your lady love? Is it the ocean? Is it silence? Is it Wordsworth’s poetry? Is it the 1860s? Perhaps she loves Taye Diggs? Pick at least three of “These are a few of my favorite things…” and come up with something creative. Then slowly incorporate the following examples/scenerios from Dating 3 + Months and more into the mix to make it extra special.

Friends with extra benefits
-Something kinky. If you like her, maybe love her, and maybe/maybe not want to blow her brains out, get her something sexy. That doesn’t always constitute lingerie persay, but…it could. Think about your favorite sexcapades: what is normally involved? Hot oil massages? Sex toys? Certain genre of music? Sexual play things? Nothing says, “I love what you do to me,” better than a great sex kit. Try filling a basket with some lub, condoms, sex toys, and something really sexually exotic that neither of you have ever tried. (Stumped for ideas? We can’t write them all here, but we can direct you to your local sex shop/Ricky’s, assuming of course you’re in NYC). Then see where the night takes you. But get really wild/adventurous.

Dating for 3+ months
-Think back over the past three months. What have the two of you done together? Think of the most special, cool, romantic, quirky moments and pick an object that stands out from one of those moments. Did you share laughs about some guy’s mustache while ice skating? (Get her a mustache mug, with matching “Ron Swanson” mustaches for the two of you to wear over dinner). Did you tease her while she cried during an episode of Game of Thrones? (Get her the DVD set and a figurine of Jamie Lanister, or whatever his name is). Did you guys experience a ‘moment’ whilst driving and a particular song came on? (Make her a mix tape with tat song and others like it…)

Dating for  1 year
-Please refer to “Dating for 3+ Months.” In addition to these ideas, something more substantially materialistic is appropriate too. What is her weakness/superficial loves: bags, shoes, makeup, body care, clothes, scents, accessories, or jewelry? Pick one of these and find her favorites. If she loves bags, find that perfect knapsack you know she’s been eyeing. If she’s a beauty regime type, take a trip to Sephora and pick out a skin care/makeup gift set. If she’s a necklace lover, find a local artisan and have something simple made for her. If she’s a shoe person, go to Bloomingdales and ask a sales rep for help. But if you follow any of these things, also, again, refer to “Dating for 3+ months” for those sentimental kicks too.

Dating longer than 2 years/Engaged
-Synthesize advice from “Dating for 3+ Months” and “Dating for 1 year.” Couple that with a momento of your relationsip: a photo gift book (collages of your history together), mix tape of your favorite songs, poetry (what, what?), and/or some other romantic set-up that showcases your time together.

Newly Weds
-Again, going along with the previous three models, pick something from there, and then get a memento of your courtship. A series of professional pictures, a beauty session together, a travel package (even to your local hotel/bed and breakfast), and set it up with small mementos of your inner personal relationship.

Old school couple/partners
Get her something that you know she’s been wanting, and no, that doesn’t include a new toaster. If you know she loves a particular scent, get her a nice perfume that exemplifies that. If you know she loves turquoise, get her a brooch or local-artisan ring featuring a turquoise stone. If she’s religious, buy her a nice rosary made from blessed stones, a Quran from a local bookshop, homemade oils from the local Pagan lady, etc. Or let’s say she has some wacky love/fetish/taste in something that no one else does: get her that. Find it! Get her an array of things that she wouldn’t normally buy for herself, just to show how well you really know her.